To Maryland and Back

I live for good times with friends and this weekend perfectly captured the essence of friendship. The Sex in the City movie was a hit at the box office.. $56M and counting. I'm convinced that every woman in America went to see this movie. But why not? We all can relate to SITC. Regardless of what they go through - love, divorce, cancer, children, disagreements, careers, and distance - they put forth the effort to maintain their friendship. This weekend my best friend and I drove down to Maryland to visit our girlfriend. We had a great time just chilling and of course we went to see SITC! It was fabulous. All the style! All the drama! All the emotion! I want to see it again AND SOON! I just love how these characters represent the true meaning of friendship and why we all need girlfriends to love & support each other. I love my girlfriends so much!! And I love the Real Dudes just as much! LOL! When we got back from MD my friend and I frantically changed clothes and rushed over to Henney's birthday party (that's what I call him and I doubt I need to explain that name). Glasses of Hennessy all over the place but of course us classy chicas sipped on Martinis. I almost got groped by a drunken and under-dressed Mexican and I went to bed just as the birds started singing their morning songs but nonetheless we had fun.

Now back to the point I was trying to make about friendship...Someone made a remark in jest about us being the old squad as if we had been replaced. The thing is although I know it is very easy for this to happen, I truly believe that if both parties want the relationship to continue it will. Friendship is work! Just like a relationship but why don't people remember that?? You have to make an effort to call, to keep in touch, and to hang out as often as possible. The friendship will die otherwise... As I was in the middle of writing this blog I got a phone call from a friend. I shared my thoughts on friendship with her and she agreed. She went on to say that when all the girls are together we are ALL friends but too often we fall right back into being "Shakes' friend" or "D's friend" for example, and keeping in touch solely through other girlfriends. I know I've only been apart of the core group for 6 years now but 6 years is a long time. My goal now is to work on erasing many of those lines that sometime get in the way of developing and maintaining a true friendship.

Love Ya!

Muscle Machine

I'm on my way to becoming a lean, mean, muscle machine hahahaha!! Seriously, this past week I started taking my health more seriously by eating better and working out more often and consistently. I've never had a poor diet but at times I tend to over eat. Eating too much of a good thing is not good. Calories are calories. I won't go back to weighing and measuring my food because that was extreme but I am making a conscious effort to have portion control. And so far so good...after only 6 days I feel great; feeling less stressed and more energetic.

This morning I woke up a little early to get in a quick work out before I had to get ready for work and today has been one of my better days. Mind, body, and soul...I feel fabulous!

I think it helps to have reminders in your daily life to keep you motivated. I want to ensure that this is not a fad but a truly integrated part of my lifestyle. Seeing family members with heart disease and diabetes pushes me to fight the odds that are stacked against me but I also have positive motivators such as my upcoming trip to Miami in July.

Friends, please help be that motivation in my life as well! Let's keep each other healthy so that we can continue to make beautiful memories. Let's pledge to keep each other off the couch!!!

Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Bartley!!!

This past weekend my sister married the love of her life. The ceremony was beautiful and everyone looked amazing. It was probably one of the most fun receptions that I've been to in a long time. I love that both families have welcomed each other with open arms. I found it funny that my dad has already began sharing the secrets on how to deal with my mom's side of the family with his new son-in-law. As beautiful as the wedding was, getting to that day didn't come without obstacles but God saw them through. I pray for peace, happiness, and many blessings for their new family.

Love never fails... 1 Corinthians 13:8

It's my birthday!!!

I never like being the center of attention but I must admit it feels good letting others showcase their appreciation and love for me today. So many phone calls, emails, and text messages from family and friends wishing me a happy birthday truly warms my heart. In this day, every birthday is a milestone no matter how old you are. It's a blessing every single day that God wakes you up to enjoy another sunrise, another commute to work, another day to love and to make life better. To see another birthday is an event worth celebrating.

I had an incredible time partying with my closest friends over the weekend. I also spent a lot of alone time connecting with God as well as pampering my mind & body. I started my summer reading list - I know that sounds like I'm in the 3rd grade but I look forward to reading for fun when I'm on break from school. I also reflected on my accomplishments and created new goals and objectives for the future. So this year's birthday was more on the non-traditional side...no cake, no ice cream, no huge dinner party but I believe it was definitely my best birthday yet. Definitely better than last year. I pray I live to celebrate many more.

Thanks friends for making life more enjoyable... I thank God for each and every one of you!

Failure?

Trying to collect my thoughts and hold back any attempt at an emotional response, I did that cutesy thing I do with my shoulders and firmly stated "I don't have one". Damn I hate these types of questions. I hate being caught off guard. I never know what to say and to be honest I don't even understand why people believe it's an appropriate question to ask. As if my life, my success, my contribution to the community, my status in this world, and my ultimate happiness are all measured against one thing... marriage. Seriously let's think about this. Does that really make any sense? Ok, I'm probably over-reacting just a bit but if you heard the things that people say to me on a regular basis you would definitely be just as frustrated. Here are just a few examples... while in the process of searching for homes - to purchase as a single woman I must add - my father, who I love and respect very much but his comment rubbed me the wrong way, asks "why am I trying to buy a house now? Don't I want to get married?" Now that's frustrating!! What do you say to something like that?? I just said that I don't see how one effects the other and I left it at that. Here's another... why do people assume that something must be wrong with me if I'm single?? For the record, Never say "ohh so you must be crazy" to a woman's face... That hurts!

Don't get me wrong ever since I was a little girl I dreamed of one day meeting Prince Charming, falling in love and living happily ever after. But considering previous relationships particularly this last one I am in no rush to jump into a situation just because some people believe it's the right thing to do. It makes more sense to continue to grow and accomplish my goals as I have been doing and not getting caught up in the you're-getting-close-to-30-and-should-get-married-and-have-babies nonsense. As ideal as it is, I know in my heart that I can't handle that right now anyways. Plus, I let God's will take control..it will happen when it happens.

The older I get the more people ask "why aren't you married?" They act as if I'm 50 years old. I'm young... It's not my time... I haven't met the right one are the obvious answers. I know the intentions behind such questions are not meant to be malicious but sometimes I wish people would just mind their own business. I guess I never realized how much this issue bothers me until tonight. The question had a new spin..."How's your love life?" Wow! WTF?!? I haven't heard that one before! I know it's not a big deal, I could have easily answered and moved on or chose not to answer and still moved on but tonight for some reason I really got emotional - on the inside of course. It was just a question. He didn't mean anything by it. I totally understand that. I wouldn't ever want him to know how much it bothered me especially since I am the one who is probably being overly sensitive about it. Perhaps because I hear so much of this from certain family members. I go back & forth with grandmom still over the whole Shah break up. It's so stupid. Why do I even have to justify my decision when he was CRAZY and one swing away from being abusive.

Needless to say I know I'm really going to hear an earful in a few weeks at my sister's wedding. I'll have to be sure to put the thick skin back but for now, I have shed it, at least for this moment just to let the hurt out.

the suga continues

This is fun

Scene two in a different place, a different time. Caught up in memories I wasn't sure how to vibe but he led the way. I got acquainted with the mood infused with candles and music taking me to a level of sensual relaxation. No apple martinis this time but the energy was still sweet. I could taste it with every kiss. No, with every bite...bite of the delicious meal he prepared that is.
Wrapped together in passion we laid still listening to rhythm and blues into the morning. Our chemistry was heightened by the soft brassy sounds of the morning rain through the open window. Exposed, I felt unusually comfortable and at ease. The only thought on my mind was to hold on to that very second. Perhaps it's the sound of his voice that captivates me like an African drum and I feel more connected with every beat. Or maybe it's his songs that he shares allowing me to know what's on his mind and in his heart. Either way, I treasure the sharing and the caring lol. I hope he agrees or thinks this sounds interesting...

No Makeup

I'm not a cover girl but I rarely leave the house without at least some makeup on even if it's just lip gloss or mascara. Actually even sometimes when I'm just chillin in the house. With it, I feel like one beautiful & perfect, well put together package. Without it I feel a bit vulnerable as if I'm exposing all my flaws to the world.

This isn't really about make up. It's about letting go and showing the true you. What's real on the inside just as well as what's real on the out. Insecure is a scary word but we all have them. Some let their insecurities get the best of them when others have an unrealistic, over-inflated perception of themselves. The rest of us fall someplace along the spectrum in between these two extremes. I told a friend last week that I'm probably one of the most real people you'll ever meet. Today I was hit with a dose of reality when a family issue resurfaced. There are things that I cover up with make up, figuratively speaking, and some things that I just don't talk about at all not even in my blog diary. That's not keeping it real! I think what I should have said is that I am very honest, open, and straight forward with those that I am comfortable with seeing me with no makeup. I think that's normal though.